Is There Truly "The One"?

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Societal Pressure on Marriage

Written by Elizabeth Karnowski, Culture Staff Writer, and Illustrated by Keely Bradish, Art Curator

Love and marriage are constantly evolving into new meanings. Many people wonder when and if they’ve met “the one.” I know myself and my friends often have these thoughts, but I also often find myself wondering if it’s valid. As a 19-year-old, the idea of being with one person for the rest of my life sounds dreadful, however, this could change within the blink of an eye.

Television series and movies embrace making content around love at first sight. According to CBS, 56% of Americans believe in love at first sight, however, a good portion of this number is already in a relationship or marriage (CBS, 2013). Old fairy tales like Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty and many others thrive off this idea and have been engraved in most of our brains since we were children. People can believe that love, at first sight, is real, however, the phenomenon isn’t really “love” since it doesn’t have any factors of intimacy, commitment or passion (Psychology Today, 2020).

Traditionally, a girl and a guy lock eyes and their story of happily ever after from there. Now, we are building new traditions. The idea of marrying someone and staying married until death does them apart is idealized, however, it’s relatively normal to divorce your first marriage.

50% of all marriages in the United States will end in divorce or separation (American Psychological Association, 2020). It’s more beneficial to be happy and alone than be with someone you’ve fallen out of love with and that’s just something that everyone should know and realize. Four in 10 new marriages involve a remarriage (Pew Research, 2019). There’s an increasing trend in the number of people who remarry, even if people don’t necessarily realize it at first.

Though marriage is an overall goal for many people, it’s something that’s not truly necessary in this day and age. There used to be a time when women needed to get married for a variety of reasons — whether it be to have kids, being financially stable or having a roof over their heads. Now, women are seen as independents within society which does, in a way, decrease the overall need for marriage. This is not to dismiss those who follow a certain religion and believe marriage is a necessary step in life. Everyone can hold themselves to their own standards because everyone has their own individual goals.

Society places a lot of pressure on marriage in general. Though it’s great for a couple to get married to show their commitment and love for each other, there’s a lot of pressure especially on younger couples to tie the knot. Everybody moves through life on their own time but once the time is right, they’ll find someone to support them emotionally and physically who they want by their side if that’s what they want.

“The one” may not be Prince Charming but, they should be someone worth your time. We are moving away from practices that were once recognized as traditional but may have inhibited people’s independence and happiness. It’s important to recognize and acknowledge this so that we don’t feel like something’s wrong with us when we don’t comply.

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