Untamed: The Latest Bestseller By Glennon Doyle
Written by Kate Lawless, Deputy Editor
You’ve probably heard of “Untamed” if you keep up with popular books. Author Glennon Doyle is well-known, especially after receiving coverage from Oprah Winfrey, and has been celebrated for years for her philanthropy and her honest memoirs about bulimia, alcoholism, marriage and motherhood. Her latest book, “Untamed,” explores her divorce from her cheating husband and the discovery that her true soulmate is actually a woman. (Quite an adjustment for her overwhelmingly Christian readers, a topic that is addressed in this book.) But you don’t need to have read the previous books to understand what’s going on in this one.
“Untamed” was one of the most popular books of 2020 and it’s not surprising given the author’s readable, yet emotional writing style. The book is an easy read because Doyle formats her chapters as a series of anecdotes about her divorce, her wife Abby, feminist parenting and the advice she gives to the women who write her. The chapters vary in length and cover big ideas about self-love that recur in new ways, yet still feel familiar and reinforce the message of the book. There’s something for everyone in here because it reads as an honest examination of an honest chapter of a woman’s life. It has ups and downs and it’s not written in a super chronological order. It fits more with the way people actually talk about life and love rather than just being a simple memoir.
My only critique is that this book may read a bit too much like a personalized self-help biography, which could turn away some readers. That style of short and sweet yet funny and feminist book has been especially popular lately. The “You are a Badass” series by Jen Sincero most readily comes to mind. But be warned, “Untamed” is considerably longer than those style contemporaries. Still, Doyle manages to keep her story moving along in a way that caters to fans of the genre.
I would describe “Untamed” as a love story, but maybe an unconventional one. That’s the beauty of a memoir. It has love-at-first-sight romance, devastating heartbreak and the overwhelming, unfailing love of family and friends. Still, it’s not just about the author. Some of my favorite chapters were about the readers who had contacted Doyle for advice about their relationships. In response, she usually advises that people listen to the “Ache”: that truest feeling inside yourself that tells you what you really want and need.
That’s the overarching theme of the book: Be committed to discovering your authentic self everyday, at each point in your life. That may feel cliche, but for women especially, there is a need for constant reminders to unlearn the patterns of thought and behavior that tell us how to look good and be perfect daughters, wives and mothers. Doyle’s book invites women to do the uncomfortable and ask ourselves what really makes us happy instead of only doing what society expects from us. Doyle’s own life just happens to be an excellent example of that ever-evolving process of self-love.
This isn’t only a book about women and for women, either. It can be expanded to any readership of people who want to be better versions of themselves in relationships. There are sections on feminist parenting for boys, religious upbringings, navigating divorce’s effects on children, dealing with hate online and how to talk about racism in your own family. There’s something for everyone here and Doyle writes in a way that addresses readers in an intimate, understanding way. She acknowledges that people are flawed — but never broken — and clearly wants this book to be of use to readers, rather than about herself.
I would encourage our Moda readers to include more books written by and about older women into their reading list. As gals in our early twenties, we have the opportunity to learn from the women who have already navigated early adulthood and emerged smarter and stronger. Glennon Doyle is one such woman, and as she reminds her readers through her books: life goes on and even gets better if you let yourself be happy.